Are You a Loser?
My definition of a loser:
‘A loser is a person who ‘habitually’ exchanges something of worth for
something
of lesser value’.
Simple, right?
'One
who continually comes up short on a trade.'
Being a loser does not just happen in cards or cars, houses, and games of
Monopoly. Our society is sick with losers; people who have traded family
life for the night life. People who have given up their wives and children
to party, or play ball and have
fun.
People who are preoccupied with fantasies of being rich, famous, powerful,
popular or pretty. Meanwhile
their
children grow up and move out of their lives and eventually their hearts.
My bone is with those who's values and decision making are inconsiderate of
what is truly important in life. In my mind the dead beat dad is not much
worse than the workaholic husband who never reads to his kids. The result is
often the same- disconnected kids who's values tend to be less on family,
less on community, less sympathetic of the needs of others, but more and
more narcissistic and hedonistic.
The children of losers generally becomes losers too,
"me, myself and I”
is passed down generationally! Materialism and self become the religion of
the land, and money becomes their god.
There are many ways to become a loser. Some ways drive one to moral
bankruptcy. Some ways take a while to come to rotten fruition. Cheating on
your spouse; even just flirting with the neighbors wife! (Flirting with the
neighbors wife trades away personal, inner integrity, while reinforcing
fantasies in the lady) Lying to help yourself; Venting in anger. In fact,
anything
that gives short term satisfaction at the sacrifice of things valuable.
"Fun" is a huge problem for losers. Many sell their souls for fun. We can
travel the world 'for' fun. Get into debt for fun. Choose not to have
children for 'fun'. Fun can become the whole pivot point and decision maker
of our lives- "But is it fun?"; “Was the trip fun?”. Will I have fun?"; "But
it is not fun"; "He’s a lot of fun", “But it’s not fun visiting grandma”.
Of course there is no way of proving the following, but I would guess that
the present generation used the word fun more than any generation proceeding
it.
So, are you a loser? Check yourself out with this test: First make a list of
everything that is objectively important in life. (You might have to check
motives
here, or you may be so far gone you don't know what
should
be a priority, but do you best) Second, make a list of anything that may, in
any way, and in your life, try to undermine what is on the first list. If
you are continually trading those things on the first list, for the second,
then you are a loser. Or you are fast becomeing one like Esau, who sold his
birthright for immediate satisfaction. If you are not, but are holding to
what is right, and to what is important, regardless of the opposition of
your foolish inner desires,
Then you are a winner!
Note:
When my boys would use the term ‘loser’ in high school. I didn’t much like
it. It was a name mostly used to stigmatize people who were least popular.
I suppose a lot of those kids were, in fact, “losers” from my definition; A
loser is not one who experiments with life and makes mistakes, but only
those who habitually turn from the truth. Sadly, the fruit of their lives
are the same;“what you reap you sow”. The important thing is to arrest the
habit, change course, make wise decisions. Then instead of people referring
to you as “a loser”, they will see something positive, a winner.
Pr 21:16 The man that wanders out of the way of understanding shall remain
in the congregation of the dead.
Mt. 16:25 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and
whosoever will lose his life for my
sake shall find it.
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